Category Archives: Verse of the Day

Not Mine, But His!

Five years ago, God placed someone in my life that would become my husband. With him came two boys. I truly believe God placed them in my life for a very specific reason and out of reverence for Him, I take my role very seriously. We now have six children between the two of us. Three daughters from my first marriage, two sons from his first marriage, and one sweet baby girl together.

Have you ever thought about why God gives us children? The bible is very clear. Psalms 127:3 states, “Behold, children are a gift of the Lord.” Another version says, “Children are a heritage from the Lord, a reward from Him.” I grew up with that verse tattooed on my heart. I knew that if I was blessed with a child, God was entrusting His child into my care until He was ready to call them home. That way of thinking allows me to let go of all earthly fears and insecurities because I know His love for them is deep. I even think He loves them more than I because He was willing to loan them to me to enjoy, knowing I am imperfect and capable of making mistakes that could potentially hurt what belongs to Him.

How do you view your children? That question changes everything in terms of how we treat our kids, who we allow to love them, how we react when they get hurt, etc.

I chose to write about this subject matter after the realization that not everyone views their children this way. Due to my beliefs, all of the children God has blessed me with in this life are seen the same way. It doesn’t matter if they share my DNA or not. They are all gifts from Him and I feel that He would be very disappointed in me if they were treated differently. I believe children that are from a divorce should be able to call their bonus parent whatever they are comfortable with. My girls have a step-mom and I feel that if they were to call her mom, it reveals that she loves them like they were her own. What mother or father wouldn’t want that for their children?

Once the ex’s became aware that their biological children were calling their step-mom and step-dad mom and dad, things did not go well. I quickly discovered that they see things very differently. They both believe that every child has one mom and dad and out of respect for their biological parents, should never call anyone by that name except for those who share DNA. After trying to communicate why we believe what we do, we were told that they told the kids it was forbidden and we were to respect them and do the same.

We decided not to honor their request, not because we don’t respect them, but because it is about what is comfortable for the kids. We sat the kids down and discussed the issue because their biological parents had already informed us that the kids were told they were to never call us mom and dad again. We explained that we didn’t care what they decided to do, but the decision was theirs and we would love them the same regardless.

Months have passed and the younger two still call us mom and dad on a regular basis. The older kids go back and forth. The biological mom refuses to speak to me ever again and the biological dad won’t speak to my husband anymore either. I have prayed for insight as to why we are all on such a different page in regards to this and God revealed it all comes down to how we see Him.

Divorce is a unique situation and there is no manual that tells us how to approach issues like these, should they arise. As a standard rule, I try my best to do what is in the best interest of the kids, even if that makes me a little uncomfortable. I have noticed that issues always arise when the needs of the parent supersede those of the children. If we see our kids as our possessions, we will feel threatened by the step-mother or step-father who is now a part of our child’s life. Once we realize that kids can love everyone close to them and are blessed to have two sets of parents who love them, there is no need for territorial control or manipulation. If you struggle with this, remember that your children are a gift. Using them as a pawn to lessen our insecurities only creates more insecurities when we don’t get the response we are looking for. It hurts our children and they should never have to choose sides.

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50 Shades vs 50 Reasons

A Work in Progress

Typically this is the weekend when you can count on an overpriced dinner and safe, if not cheesy, romantic comedy, but what Hollywood has released this Valentine’s Day is far from safe.

Social media and the blogosphere are full of “50 reasons not to see 50 Shades of Gray” articles so I’m not going pile on with another list of reasons we should avoid it when those reasons should already be obvious to any believer or morally conscious individual.

But one thing I haven’t heard much about is the irony of this type of movie opening on this particular weekend.  We all know 50 Shades was strategically placed over the weekend we set aside to celebrate love and romance.  But what the movie is supposed to portray and what Valentines is supposed to represent aren’t in the same universe.  It’s like marketing a slasher film as a Christmas movie just…

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Signs

Back in February of this year, I was leading a bible study by Beth Moore titled, “Sacred Secrets”. There was one specific video that brought me to tears. Beth mentioned that even with all of the advances in science, God still reserves the right to be the only one to know that we even exist upon the first 7-14 days of conception. Jeremiah 1:5 says, “Before I formed you, I knew you.” Although I have heard this verse, I never truly grasped the meaning.

Fast forward to now and I am almost fifteen weeks pregnant. There is no doubt in my mind that God shared that with me when He did as a sign of things to come and to prepare my heart to see things from His perspective.

From the moment I discovered I was expecting, dreams of twins have been present. Upon telling both my mom and mother-in-law, they both said, “It is going to be twins.” Last week my husband and I attended my first doctor’s appointment. While my doctor was listening for the babies heartbeat, she asked if twins ran in either of our families. Was this another sign? She ordered me to go get a sonogram that same day. As the ultrasound tech began, he immediately asked if I had two uterus’. Then I saw it. Two sacs, two babies, a miracle none the less. After much confusion on his part, he proceeded to tell us that he thought it was just a mirror image of the baby reflecting off of something. He mentioned that he had heard of this before but had never seen it in his ten years in this profession. He called a fellow tech in for a second opinion. She too had never seen such a thing. After about forty-five minutes of studying the screen, they called a doctor in to take a look. Both babies were moving at the same time, in unison, so although they couldn’t tell us wether it was one baby or two, it seemed they had come to the conclusion that it was one. We were told we would have to wait for our doctor to deliver the results after the radiologist reviewed the findings and submitted them to her office. So the wait began. I have to admit that I am a little skeptical. God doesn’t give us signs for no reason. There is a purpose, a pointing to something bigger.

A sign is defined as an event whose presence or occurrence indicates the probable presence or occurrence of something else; an indication or evidence of what is happening or going to happen; a gesture or action used to convey information or instructions.

On Sunday at church when I read what the pastor was going to be discussing I thought to myself, “Great, a story that I already know so well I could get up and talk about it.” I should have known that God was going to teach me something that day because just when I think I have something figured out, He shows me something new that changes everything. As the pastor began speaking, he said two words that caught my attention and brought tears to my eyes…A SIGN! I already knew God was at work in our lives through the life of our unborn child/children so He used that to get my undivided attention. The pastor went on to explain that when God turned the water into wine at the wedding in Galilee, he was pointing us towards a new creation that was coming into the world. His sign was revealing something significant beyond the “wow” factor of what on the surface was the first of many miracles. Every time I have heard this story in the past, I thought Jesus was just doing this to reveal that He could meet our needs, even if they were insignificant in the big scheme of things. I thought it was His way of revealing His heart towards His children. Boy was I wrong and God blew me away that day. 

I went straight to my study bible to see what other insights I could gain from this story and this is what I read…Through this sign, Jesus revealed His “glory.” John 1:14 “We have seen His glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” Radiating God’s presence, Jesus reflected His glory. 

I believe that God used the appearance of two babies in our sonogram to remind us that He is and will always be the one we need to turn to for understanding and clarity. No other human or doctor will ever have all the answers. God will reveal everything to us in His timing. Until then, we were blessed with a sign that reflects His glory and the amazing things He is doing in our lives. 

 

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