This very subject matter has bothered me for years. Back in 2010, when I was at rock bottom due to several losses in my life, I was told I was depressed and needed to get on an anti-depressant to help me through it. My doctor said it was no big deal and the dosage would be small. He then explained that we would try it for 30 days and go from there. But…that but told me what I already knew. There was a catch. Take the pill and come back so we can wean you off of it. Really? If I have to go through a detox program, I am out! At that point I am just medicating one problem with another set of problems.
If you have read my stories, you know that I went against my gut instinct and took the medicine anyway, or so I thought. I let Satan convince me that I would be fine and I accidentally overdosed on sleeping pills in an attempt to numb the pain God was using to refine me into the person He created me to be. Luckily, God wasn’t done with me yet. I have no doubt that I died that night, only to be saved by my loving Heavenly Father, not a drug!
Now every time I see commercials for medication, I cringe. I wonder at what point did we as a country decide that fixing one ailment was worth accepting a long list of side effects that are actually worse than our original problem? I agree with Matt. Sometimes a little pain is okay to experience. I am not a theologian, but I vaguely recall Jesus purposely placing a “thorn” in the side of Paul, causing great pain. The purpose was so that he would need Jesus and rely on Him for everything.
So what if your current thorn was meant to draw you back to God and instead of going there you turn to medication?
I haven’t been sleeping well.
I’ve never slept well, actually. I’m up late, even though I’d rather be asleep, and I wake often during the night. When I do sleep, I sleep restlessly. I don’t dream. I’m always tired. Sure, this could have something to do with our 8 month old twins, but my sleeping issues developed long before the little ones arrived.
I tell you this in order to explain why I was Googling tips for curing insomnia. I don’t want drugs. I won’t take them. I just wanted some advice. Specifically, I wanted better advice than “count in your head until you fall asleep.” I tried that one a few nights ago; I got to 3, and then I started thinking about Pi. And then I tried to list the digits in Pi, but I could only remember 3.14. And then I started thinking about the movie Pi —…
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